Movies

For Mother’s Day, Patton decided she wanted to see a movie at the theater. To give you an idea of the quality of wife with whom I’ve chosen to spend my life, it should be noted that her first choice was the new Star Trek. Sorry nerds — she’s very spoken for. This is not for lack of trying on your behalf as I’m told one of you tried to get her phone number years ago by impressing upon her the coolness of having one’s own starship. (True story.)

So we went and saw the movie. And I can honestly say that if you are a fan of action movies, sci-fi movies or anything in between, you should go see this movie. I enjoyed it thoroughly. It appeals that part of the movie-goer’s heart which loved Raiders of the Lost Ark and Star Wars in that it’s just too much fun not to enjoy. They casted the parts wonderfully and the characters mesh in a whole new way, which is no small feat considering the legacy they’re following.

I’m what you would call a peripheral fan of Star Trek. I’ve been to one convention and have no real need to attend another. (It’s a fantastic opportunity to watch nerds in their native habitat, and overall fills one’s people-watching quota for a long time.) I was only passively aware of the original series but watched a good deal of “The Next Generation” series. If nothing else, I love the movies. You get attached to the characters even if you only have even the slightest of knowledge from the original series.

From the moment I heard they were remaking Star Trek I knew there was going to be a shitload of pissed off Trekkers. As a fan of movies in general I can say honestly that the concept of “remaking Star Trek” was somewhat anathema to me. I mean for godssakes is Hollywood that totally bereft of ideas? But I’ve seen the fans and thought I’d leave the initial judgments up to them.

Now it could be that I’m just not traveling in the right circles, but I heard little from the Trek-faithful. And the more I heard about casting, the more bits and parts I saw in trailers, the more I thought that J J Abrams may not be all that nuts. And I can honestly say that I’m happy to have been wrong about the whole venture.

But I couldn’t help but think that the Klingon-speaking, Vulcan-eared part of the population out there must either be seething with rage over what is, by any measure, a complete re-write of their beloved characters, or they could very well have renounced the franchise altogether. Regardless, I think Roddenberry would’ve been proud of this movie and the faithful would be ill-advised to dismiss it simply because it’s a new vision of a clearly over-written storyline. This is, after all, the 9th movie in the franchise and by this time, with few notable exceptions, storylines are so played out you want to shoot the writers.

So to sum up, go check out this movie and enjoy it on the big screen. You won’t be disappointed.

One of my favorite television episodes was from NewsRadio called “Super Karate Monkey Death Car“. It was centered around the boss of the radio station, Jimmy James, having a book he wrote that was not successful translated into Japanese where it was a huge success. He figured that he could capitalize on this by having it translated back into English and reprinted to be sold to the American public again. He made his first appearance on the new book tour without having been familiar with the new text. From that came one of those moments in my life where I honestly found it difficult to breathe because of laughter.

What I’ve come to discover is that this can be found in the real world as well — this dystopian thinking that by reverse-translation something new and wonderful can be found. Unfortunately most folks haven’t realized that it’s only true application is comedy. Case in point: A link to “Early Promo Stills” or a live-action adaptation of the highly popular video game Left 4 Dead.

For those who aren’t familiar, the game is based entirely on the stereotypes of the typical zombie movie, all the way down to the dichotomy of the cast of characters, complete with compulsory black male in a business suit and tough woman under extenuating circumstances. It’s what makes the game so popular apart from what I’ve heard described as fantastic gameplay.

So to think that anyone could be seriously considering making a video game that is based on all zombie movies into a new zombie movie is nothing short of hilariously inept to me. What makes it funnier is that people will spend money to see it.

Last night was a cathartic moment for my wife. Heath was at last granted that sweet nod by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for what can only be described as the only performance deserving to be nominated. But for my wife is was confirmation of the genius she saw in a one-time little-known actor. And to those who are no doubt saying that “he only got this award because he died”, you are wrong. There is no other way of putting it. This isn’t so much a matter of opinion as it is empirical fact.

All in all I’d say the Academy got it right. At least I have no overwhelming objections to the final choices. Perhaps they got a bit enamored by Slumdog Millionaire, but that happens every year it seems. I’m happy for their cast and crew but eight Oscars? One for best music? Really? Okay, no biggie.

What stunned me was the “In Memoriam”. I make it a point to watch this part every year because I think it’s worth a few moments to pay tribute to the folks who dedicated their lives to their craft, which inspires millions of people. And I’ll be honest, I was looking for one particular tribute. And as they went by actors, actresses, producers and even a movie critic (??!), it started to become more and more obvious that they weren’t going to get to him. And as the screen closed on Paul Newman, I rose from my seat and listened to the rest of the program in the background. Not one mention of George Carlin.

Shocked I tell you

And I slept on it. I think I’ve come to the conclusion that George would’ve no doubt found great humor in being passed over in lieu of a movie critic. I don’t think it would’ve been his shining moment either — he was better than that. Hell, he’s still more talented than 70% of the people in that auditorium. But I did check things out on the net and as it turns out, not only was I not the only one who noticed the snub, but a few other rather notable people were passed over as well. Eartha Kitt, Harvey Korman, Estelle Getty…

Wow. Great job Academy. I’m glad you included that movie critic.

As a fan of movies, and in particular animated features, I’ve grown a bit weary of sequels. Disney is the most notorious suspect. They seem to have absolutely no qualms whatsoever squeezing every last dollar out of a franchise to a point where the final product is unrecognizable when contrasted against the original. In general the story takes a dive but, and to me this is actually more important, the animation quality tanks.

With the formation of Pixar, John Lassiter and his crew have given new life to an otherwise overlooked medium, that of the animated short. Anyone who has seen For The Birds or Geri’s Game knows first-hand that you don’t have to make a full-length feature film to rivet people to their seats. But what they did is a nearly forgotten art that dates back to the beginning of film. Speaking from a historical standpoint, Mickey Mouse and Bugs Bunny owe their infamy to quick animated shorts that were tagged on to feature films. But what I have enjoyed is the evolution this medium has gone under with the advent of advanced technology that allows pixels to take on a life all their own which conveys even the most subtle of human traits.

And that brings me to the following video, which shines as an example of not only the brilliance that animated shorts have, but that sequels can be made which do not suck.

On a side note: This is a perfect example of my favorite advice. “Men are stupid, women are evil.”

Heya Man.

It’s been six months since you left and I made the decision to wait until now to write my final letter to you. The reason for this was, of course, because I wanted to see The Dark Knight and take every moment I could to savor the crow literally thousands of people had to feed themselves — namely, those who didn’t think you could play your part or even mad fun of you for it. Fools. Every last one of them.

My wife took your loss pretty hard. I had the less-than-fortunate job of telling her what happened. And I can honestly say that it looked like a good portion of her soul died with you that day. All color dropped from her face and her eyes glassed over as her mind struggled to wrap her head around what I told her is a soft, solemn tone. I know all too well what it feels like to lose a personal hero, but I realized quickly that I have next to no experience in helping someone cope with it.

My wife is still convinced that you actually read my posts and I can’t help but wonder if you did. You pulled off The Joker with such incredible skill even I was stunned. Was that because of my advice, or perhaps just the very same advice that anyone with knowledge of Batman’s legacy would give? I guess I’ll never know now.

I guess that’s all I really wanted to say. There’s so much cliche surrounding death that when one goes through it, one might almost be happy to avoid hearing the same old tired phrases. But I do know that you managed to touch and inspire a great many people in Hollywood in your short tenure, as was clearly evident in the weeks after you left. And your baby girl Matilda will grow up with a vast treasure trove of your work and I can only hope that you managed to catch some of your own home movies so that she can treasure who you are as a person as well.

But all in all I wanted to congratulate you for simply the greatest portrayal anyone could expect of what is undoubtedly an iconic character of American literature — The Joker is right up there with Boo Radley and Huck Finn. And you knocked it out of the park. You owned that film and the personality of The Joker is better defined for all time because of it. Thank you for proving me right beyond any of my own expectations.

And farewell Heath. You will be missed terribly.